Framework for happiness
The more one obsesses over happiness the less happy one tends to be. I used to think monks knew it better. I used to see people go to the therapist and I wouldn’t understand why you would go get frameworks for the mind when you could read them in books and perform human experiences and see how the brain reacts. I am 200% in favour of therapy. I have been to therapy myself and I understand how it can help. But books? Oh, books. Once one falls in love with words that have been written with so much love and dedication, one cannot stop. It’s called respect for ignorance. I worship ignorance.
I used to think monks knew it better, so peaceful and serene. That they had all the answers. After meeting so many of them, I can say if you have reached some level of enlightenment (let’s say you have reached Moksha, which is not pure enlightenment since you can still pretty much fall back again into worldly temptations) one can see more clearly. They can see what we cannot see, which is expansion. Most of us have a tunnel vision of reality, with all it conveys. I tried to cross the bridge and looked at both sides. On one side I have seen light, the purest of all. Some people call it spirituality. On the other side, I see careers. I see intellectual growth, community and anxiety.
I like to think you can have all, but you also can’t. I like to think balance can be achieved, but most people I admire are the least balanced people I have ever met. Or read about. Instead of balance, they look for focus.
In the end, each and single one of us has an aim, a goal: let’s say it’s a career, relationships, overall contentment or spiritual liberation. In the end, even spirituality happens to be a goal, a direction. Except in this case the more you plan it, the less you get it. The more you want it, the further away from it you get. Buddha used to tell that story of the guy who asked him if he meditates 1 hour a day how long would it take to become enlightened? Buddha said 2 years. What about 2 hours? 5 years. 5 hours? 10 years. The harder he wanted it, the further away the goal became. I wonder how much of this is transferrable to real life.